To win the admiration of others. To get out of an awkward social situation. Examples of how telling lies can look when motivated by this are claiming to have a babysitter problem to get out of a dull party, or ending a telephone conversation by saying there is someone at the door. To avoid embarrassment. The child who claims the wet seat resulted from water spilling, not from wetting her pants, is an example if the child did not fear punishment, only embarrassment. To maintain privacy without notifying others of that intention.
For example, the couple who claims to have eloped because the cost of a wedding was beyond their means when, in reality, they were avoiding the obligation to invite their families.
To exercise power over others by controlling the information the target has. Famously embodied by Hitler, this is arguably the most dangerous motive for telling lies. I suspect there are motivations behind telling lies that fall outside one of the above nine categories , such as trivial deceits like lies told out of politeness or tact, which are not easily subsumed by these nine motives. However, these nine were presented in data I collected myself and can, at least, be used as the foundation to explain why people lie.
When lying, the face often contains two messages- what the liar wants to show and what the liar wants to conceal. Often, these hidden emotions leak in the form of a micro expression , a brief half a second or less involuntary facial expression revealing true emotion.
While Dr. And over the course of a week we deceive about 30 percent of people we have interactions with. Wow wow. De Paulo found that men lie more often to impress. A typical conversation between two guys contains about eight times as many self-oriented lies as it does lies about others.
Three key parts of our brain are stimulated when we lie. Second, the limbic system due to the anxiety hi, amygdala! Just for fun, add the anterior cingulate cortex because it helps in monitoring errors, and the dorsal lateral prefrontal cortex because it is trying all the while to control our behavior.
Our brain is busy, busy, busy when we lie. Zety found:. Are we all pathological liars? Or do we need to look at why we feel compelled to make up stories instead of just telling the truth? Is lying to avoid work a cultural problem, at least in part? Being lied to can be frustrating and it often breaks the bond of trust between two people, causing problems in the relationship. Knowing the reasons why people lie, however, can shed some light on the problem and help us understand the people who lie.
Self-Defense Many people lie because they want to protect themselves from an unpleasant situation or conflict. Think of young children who lie; they lie to make sure that they don't get into trouble. Children lie to avoid unpleasant consequences or punishment. Adults do the same. Many people lie because they know they've done something that will anger the other person.
A woman might lie about the cost of the shoes she purchased and a man might lie about which buddy he was going to hang out with. These lies are strictly to escape punishment or to avoid a fight. The person may not have done anything wrong, but would prefer not to have to justify, explain or face an irate spouse. To Spare Feelings. To Protect Feelings While some people who lie want to protect the feelings of others and spare someone else pain or hurt, many people lie to protect their own feelings, self-esteem, self-confidence, or other personal emotion.
A woman who says, "I didn't want that job anyway," when she really did, is lying to protect herself. A child who yells out, "I hate you! To Keep a Secret When thinking of lies that are concocted to keep a secret, one must only think of birthdays and Christmas.
Plenty of people lie about where they went or what they bought, with the good intention of maintaining an aspect of surprise.
Most of the time, the lies are obvious. When the truth comes out and the teen receives a nice gift for a special occasion, the lie is forgiven and forgotten. Many people want to present a good image, often for work-related reasons. Think of a job interview where a person might dress well and attempt to impress the interviewer in order to land the job. People who lie for image reasons often do so because they want to gloss over a blemish in their work history or avoid providing the real reason for termination of employment from a previous job.
To Be Liked Everyone wants to be liked and being part of the group is important, as well as part of human nature. Many people lie simply to be accepted by others. A person may feign interest in something or agree with a statement he or she does not believe. One problem that might occur with this type of lie is a lack of individuality, as well as not being able to be oneself. To Manipulate Others.
We learn very quickly that we can manipulate other people. Whether we choose to do so might be a subject of debate. The fact remains that many people lie to get other people do what they want them to do. People who lie to manipulate a situation or other people are often only interested in personal gain and fail to consider other people's feelings.
By lying or omitting details, the person can achieve a personal goal.
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